I think you just try it and see. There’s no way to know ahead of time if something’s perfect for you - life is an unfolding journey. Plan to make adjustments as you go and start going!

Emma

I initially read this because my husband is in a job that he is unhappy in. We have 2 small children and live on one income. It pays really well and has benefits for something in his field. It would be really hard to replace that if he left. He is really unhappy. Things are really tight financially and I am always looking for ways I could contribute without just working to pay for daycare, besides, I have worked since I was 16 and I feel confident when I can provide.

I have so many interests and so many passions. They have mostly been dormant all these years. I lived my life the way I was “supposed” to and not staying true to myself. I have just made the decision to start a business (bought a domain name). It is scary though because I do not know if it is what I really want to do. I am really excited about it. How do I know if this is it?

Rebecca

Congratulations, it sounds like you are in a place where you get to make a decision–your destiny rests in your hands. Do you stay safe, comfortable, and unhappy/unfulfilled, or do you take the risk to discover what else is out there for you and start to create a life you truly enjoy?

Your parents probably think that financial security will provide you happiness, but perhaps if you explain the cost that it has to your personal well-being, and that it isn’t actually leading to happiness, they might gain some understanding. Ultimately they want for you to be happy (I’m guessing), so if they get that you are truly making a conscious decision to go for that, instead of a reckless decision, they may be able to understand it. However, at the end of the day you have to live your own life as well and sometimes other people don’t understand what we do until much later, but we have to do what we are called to do anyway.

Fear can be mitigated by knowledge–start researching what you might want to do next. The more you understand the territory you are walking into, the more secure you will feel and the easier it will be to go forward. The real thing to fear is inertia or stagnation, where you are frozen by the fear. Let the fear motivate you to find out what you really need to do to create the income you want doing something you enjoy.

Emma

I’m wondering if you have an picture of what “knowing who you are” that you are comparing yourself to? Where does that picture come from?

I have read books, attended classes, introspected, am part of a spiritual community, done some writing, got coaching but I still do not know who I truly am, what I am capable of or what I am called to do. I have glimpses of this, but what brings me joy seems to be nonstatic– it seems to change over time.

What seems to stick is trying out different activities and seeing what they feel like– do they push me and do I feel joy in doing them at the same time? I often do not know until I try something out for awhile. The advice I get is to get clear on what I want and who I am. But for me that seems to stick more as an experiential process rather than sitting down and thinking about it.